


Abby's Problem

by LenoraLana



Category: The Last of Us
Genre: Abortion, F/M, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-30
Updated: 2020-06-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:22:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25000846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LenoraLana/pseuds/LenoraLana
Summary: Abby has a medical problem that she won't share with Lev. Will she tell him what it is? Is there something that he can do to help? Read and find out!
Relationships: Abby/Owen (The Last of Us)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 46





	Abby's Problem

_ A/N: This story takes place about a month or two after Abby killed Jesse, shot Tommy and let Dina and Ellie go. _

Lev tossed another flat stone across the top of the creek he sat next to, watching it skim across the top six times before it tumbled and sank into the meter-deep water. The ripples continued to grow in the water briefly, colliding with one-another as each place the rock had disturbed intersected. Soon, all was still again, as though there hadn’t been any disturbance.

He knew that he shouldn’t have been doing that at all. It could easily attract unwanted attention and he knew better than anyone that enemies, whether they be human or Infected, could attempt to subdue or kill him for any reason. 

But he had already been sitting there in the same spot, concealed by very tall grass in-between two old, rusted cars without  _ any _ sign of movement from anything. He even had two escape routes planned, one being to rush into an old tunnel just ten feet behind him that lead to an ancient junkyard, the other would be to jump frog-like into a deeper area of the creek and swim under a nearby, broken bridge where he’d easily gain a vantage point.

Besides, Abby had left him with strict instructions to stay put and wait for her. If she ran into trouble, she was supposed to yell. She had only gone into one building that was exactly thirty meters ahead anyway, and while it appeared fairly large it was small compared to some of the other buildings they’d visited in their travels.

Normally, Lev might have disobeyed her wishes and started to go after her by now, but in this case something made him stay put. There was just something about Abby’s attitude and behavior lately that was… ‘off’, even for her. Lev had already accepted that there were many things he might never understand about her fully, since both of them had been raised in different ways by different people. But…

This was something different, he could just tell. It was something that she wanted kept private, something she wanted to take care of herself. But what  _ was _ it? What was wrong?

The best he’d managed to get out of her was that she might have been sick or something. At first he had been very concerned that she had been Infected and wouldn’t tell him, but he’d taken the liberty of examining her the best he could without waking her while they slept the previous night. There had been no signs of bite marks or the discolorations that appeared when someone was bitten by an Infected, nor was Abby coughing or showing any signs that spores had gotten into her lungs. 

Yet there was obviously  _ something _ wrong. Abby had thrown up that morning when they tried to share a small breakfast together, barely able to keep water down. Lev had quickly dismissed the idea that it was a stomach bug, because Abby was tough and she wouldn’t let something moderate like that sidetrack her too much.

No, if they had come all the way out here to try and find a specific kind of medical supplies or medicine that Abby apparently wanted or needed, there was something more going on. So… why wouldn’t she tell him? What was it that she didn’t want to share with him?

Lev took the liberty of tossing another smooth, flat stone across the water. Abby had been the one who taught him to do that, apparently it was a fun pastime she used to do with her Dad. Lev couldn’t even remember many fun things he had done with his own mother, though he always felt that he was on the verge of rejection anyway. He couldn’t help being born the way he was, and he just couldn’t pretend to be something he wasn’t because society or culture dictated otherwise.

The only two people who’d ever accepted him fully, who knew all of the private details about him, were Yara and Abby. He’d never expected to find more welcome and acceptance from a stranger and former enemy than he would ever have found from his own mother. The ironic thing was that he would have left Abby for dead to strangle from that noose if Yara hadn’t urged him to cut her down.

Yara had been right. Abby had definitely been worth saving.

Lev felt his throat constrict at the thoughts of his mother and sister. This was a big reason why he preferred to keep moving, to keep his mind focused on the task at hand. Too much time sitting around allowed feelings to resurface, and those could be distracting. But still, what if he was going to lose Abby to whatever illness afflicted her?

He couldn’t let that happen. He wouldn’t lose her, not after he’d lost everyone and everything else that had ever meant anything to him.

Finally choosing to ignore Abby’s firm orders, he slowly moved cat-like from his concealed position and began to head toward the entrance of the building…

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Abby had been pleasantly surprised to find that the building that she had just scoured every inch of had very few encounters with anything dangerous. By this point, she was used to almost always encountering some Infected, some remnants of the WLFs who wanted vengeance for Issac’s death, (even if that was really the stubborn man’s own fault…) or some remnant Scars.

In this case, the only thing that had taken her by surprise was the floor in one area giving her an unexpected tumble into the lower regions and a different area where a portion of the ceiling had nearly fallen on her. She just made it a point to be more careful, particularly since she had ordered Lev to stay outside.

This was… just something she  _ needed _ to do for herself in private. He didn’t need to know why they were here or what she was after. Once she had what she needed, it wouldn’t matter anymore and there would be no reason for him to know or to concern himself anyway.

The only problem was that the kind of medicine she desperately sought just didn’t seem to be here. She had been operating on a second-hand rumor that some of it  _ might _ have been here, due to the fact that there used to be a person who dealt with pharmaceutical drugs living and operating out of this building. She hadn’t expected to find anyone alive, considering the fact that the same rumors had told her that this place had already been raided… not to mention the skeletal corpse in the bedroom clearly showed that person had been killed during said raid.

Indeed, everything appeared to be pretty well picked over. There was a package of bandaids here or perhaps an overlooked bottle of Aspirin over there in the way back corner of a cupboard, but nothing useful. If she really wanted to get what she needed, she would have to find out where the supplies had been taken.

Even then, it would be gambling on the fact that the supplies hadn’t already been used or redispersed.

A loud crunch sounded overhead, momentarily startling her and freezing her in place as she looked around. It took her a moment to realize that a beam overhead was giving way, and by that point it had already broken and was on its way down, ready to smash directly into her head…

She found herself being slammed against the floor nearby as a petite form tackled her, pushing her out of the way at the last second. A small cloud of dust rose up around her and her rescuer, causing both of them to hack and sneeze until it settled, even as their eyes continued to burn.

Abby already knew who it was even before her vision cleared. She glared at him. “Lev, I thought I told you to stay outside!”

“You were almost killed just now!” Lev shot back. “Come on, let’s get you out here!”

This time, Abby didn’t bother to argue. More of the building was creaking and making noise, making it clear that the rest of it was planning to collapse soon. Whoever raided this place, they did a pretty good job of damaging the support structure before they left… perhaps that had been their intention.

Lev grabbed her hand and pulled her toward the nearest exit. Abby, knowing that she wasn’t going to find what she came here to find anyway, offered no resistance and followed him out.

Just as they finished getting clear, the building groaned one final time and fulfilled its noisy threats to finally cave in. When the dust settled, there was nothing still standing except a couple of walls and some of the external support structure.

“Did you find what you were looking for in there?” Lev finally asked.

“No,” Abby panted, still trying to catch her breath. “No, I didn’t.”

“What were you looking for? I could help you find it,” Lev offered.

“No fucking way. I looked everywhere in there, it’s not there. And it’s not safe to go back in there.”

Lev frowned, eyeing her with concern. “You need medicine, you said so yourself. Can we look elsewhere for it?”

“Maybe, I need to go back and look over my information again… and find out more.”

They began to walk in silence, heading back in the general direction of a building they’d been using to camp out in. For the time-being, until and unless they could find someone to accept them, it was all they had. Abby still held a distant hope that she could find some remnants of the Fireflies again, knowing that they would still accept her and even Lev. They wanted to rebuild society, and that meant they would be accepting of anyone who came in peace.

But there was still an important matter she had to attend to first.

They arrived back at their home, the smallest yet sturdiest house in the area that remained standing. Both of them knew that they wouldn’t be there forever, they would eventually move onto Santa Barbara, but Abby had been fairly certain that what she needed was still in this area somewhere… but apparently, she had been wrong.

“Abby,” Lev said after he shut the door and locked it, “you  _ must _ tell me what’s wrong. Are you ill? Are you injured?” He eyed her once again, trying to locate any outward sign of disease, physical trauma or other signs of distress.

Abby barely glanced at him as she lit a small kerosene lamp and dropped the match in a bucket of rain water. “I just have a problem that I need to take care of before we do anything else,” was all she said.

“But why won’t you tell me what it is?” Lev demanded, frustrated at her stubborn need for privacy. He could understand wanting to keep things to yourself from an enemy or even a friendly stranger whom you weren’t sure of yet, but he’d thought that they were beyond that now. “If you tell me what you need, maybe I could help you find it. I might know of things or places you don’t know.”

“Lev,” Abby sighed, turning to face him now, “there are some things that are just… not easy to share. Things I need to take care of myself.”

“All we have is each other now,” Lev pointed out. “We need to share things with each other if we are going to survive. Or do you still not trust me, even after all this time?” His tone remained even, but his eyes betrayed a small amount of hurt.

Abby’s tough exterior softened somewhat as his eyes locked with hers. “Okay,” she finally said, sitting down in a chair and motioning him to sit across from her. Rather than bring another chair over, Lev simply sat on the floor close to her and folded his legs Indian-Style. Although she had never asked, Abby got the distinct impression that that was the same way he used to sit near one of his Elders, possibly his mother as well, whenever they had something serious to discuss.

“Lev,” Abby cut to the chase, “I’m pretty sure I’m pregnant.”

The young man’s eyes blinked and widened. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah. And I’m not keeping the baby. That’s why I went into that building, I was trying to find abortion pills.”

Lev frowned. “What are abortion pills?”

“It’s a kind of medicine that would… force me to have a period and get the fetus out along with it,” Abby explained. “I just can’t be responsible for a new, helpless baby right now, especially with how uncertain everything is right now.”

“Was Owen the father?” Lev asked intuitively. He had witnessed one of the awkward moments between Abby and Owen just before Lev himself had headed out with Abby to get medical supplies for Yara. Clearly, something intimate had happened between them, although Lev had never pressed the subject. 

“Yeah,” Abby breathed simply, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Why didn’t you want to tell me? Did you think I would try to convince you to keep it?”

“I don’t know, I just wanted to take care of it myself. I didn’t feel like anyone needed to know.”

“I think I understand,” Lev said slowly. He looked thoughtful. “I can help you take care of this.”

Abby blinked, looking at him in uncertainty. “What do you mean?”

“I did this once for my mother. I can do it for you, too.”

“You helped your mother have an abortion?” Abby suddenly wasn’t sure if she should feel creeped out or… what. Her skin paled somewhat at the notion.

Lev explained, “After my father died, my mother declared that she did not want another spouse, nor did she want any more children. When she found out she was pregnant, she had me help her remove it so she wouldn’t have to go through the pregnancy for a child she did not want.”

Abby kept her mouth shut, thinking for a moment about how much sense that made. A death cult would definitely have a method for abortion set up, though the thought of having a child do it for his own mother… she wasn’t even sure what to think of it.

“Did your mom have you do it because she didn’t want anyone else to know?” Abby finally asked.

“No one else needed to know,” Lev shrugged like it was nothing. “It was her decision to make and her body.”

“Too bad your people couldn’t have been this open-minded when it comes to your gender or shaving your head,” Abby couldn’t help but comment. 

“A new child is a burden if it isn’t wanted or if there may not be someone willing to care for it,” Lev said. “Our people had to remain strong and ready for a fight. If someone knew they didn’t want a child, it was best to end the pregnancy quickly as not to hinder the woman or waste resources supporting the growth of a fetus that would be killed or abandoned after birth.”

“I guess that makes sense,” Abby said, even if she was still a little creeped out by the entire notion. “How did you… um… help your mother end it?” She couldn’t quite suppress a shudder.

Lev stood in a smooth movement and walked over to one of their supply cabinets, then examined some of the things they had in the kitchen. After a couple of minutes, he returned to Abby with a medical kit and a pair of tongs. “These will do,” he said. “If you’re ready, we can get started right now.”

“Hold on,” Abby held up her hands, “I want to know  _ what _ it is you’re planning to do before you do it.”

“First I will need you to lie down so that I can feel where it is,” Lev explained, “then I will disinfect this,” he indicated the tongs, “and I will extract it. It should be possible because the fetus is still very small in you… but it will hurt,” he warned firmly.

Abby stood and paced the room for a moment, finally settling on looking out one of the windows. Lev stood nearby, patiently, giving her time and space to consider what he said and make her own decision. It was  _ her _ body, after all, and he wouldn’t insist or pressure her into a decision. He had merely offered, and he waited for her to make up her mind and give him an answer patiently.

“Well,” Abby finally said, “it looks like I’m not gonna find any abortion pills anytime soon. If I wait too much longer, it’s gonna be a  _ lot _ harder to remove it and I’m not gonna be able to move as easily.” She turned to face her younger friend fully, taking in a deep breath and letting it out slowly. “You sure you know what you’re doing?”

“Yes, my mother had said that I did it far better than anyone else she had ever seen. You will just need to rest for a couple of days to let your body adjust and heal.”

“Alright,” Abby agreed hesitantly, “let’s just get this show on the road.”

At Lev’s instruction, Abby stripped down to her underwear and laid back on her bed. She did her best to remain still as he probed and palpated her abdomen in an attempt to locate the fetus. When he finally found it, a lump that was just a bit smaller than an egg, he nodded. “Okay, I’m going to reach inside now to get it out,” he told her. “I’ll need you to take off your underwear.”

Abby complied, feeling more self-conscious than she had before. She had learned over the years not to be shy during medical exams, but this was something a bit more intrusive… it almost felt like a borderline violation. It was going to be a very mild surgical procedure, without the aid of painkillers.

Hopefully it would just be straightforward, though. Just reach in and pluck it out like a splinter or an ingrown toenail. Yes, that’s how she had to think of it.

_ Stop being a fucking pussy about this, _ Abby told herself firmly.  _ The only reason you’re getting queasy is because you’re not familiar with this kind of… surgical technique. After today, you’ll know. You’ve been through a lot worse than this, stop being a baby. _

Abby spread her legs and gritted her teeth as she felt the cold, freshly disinfected metal moving up inside her. Lev carefully guided it while keeping his fingers pressed against the outside of her abdomen, keeping track of where the fetus was. After all, he had to go in blind without the aid of an ultrasound.

After a couple of painful attempts, during which time Abby tried to remain still and not complain, despite how much it hurt to feel the pressure, scraping and roaming of those tongs as Lev tried to grab the stubborn, slippery collection of cells inside her. It was almost as though the growth had integrated so deeply that it didn’t want to leave, and it was trying to resist by being stubborn.

Abby felt her throat constrict with guilt, knowing she could still stop this. One command to Lev, and he would cease his attempts. That fetus could easily grow into a person, the one remaining thing she would still have of Owen… did it deserve a chance at life?

The better question seemed to be… would Abby be able to offer it a good life? She was constantly on the move for now, she needed to figure out what she would do in the future or if she even  _ had _ a future. She had already taken Lev under her wing, but he was able to take care of himself and help her out, too. A baby would be a drain on both of them, she couldn’t guarantee that she could protect it, and she couldn’t fight against Infected or other enemies if she became weighed down with a giant bulge in her belly in a few months.

She had to think about herself and Lev, first. Perhaps if Mel had gotten an abortion, she wouldn’t be dead because she would have been more mobile… but she loved life more than anything and wanted to keep the baby. It had cost her, she had lost both her life and the baby, but… it had been her choice. It was her choice and her fetus, after all.

Abby kept anything she felt inside, allowing Lev to proceed. She finally witnessed his triumph as he murmured something, and he successfully extracted it. 

It did hurt. It felt as though a layer of sensitive tissues had been ripped out from inside of her, causing some blood to spill out onto the sheets. The tongs flashed briefly as a sun beam reflected off the surface of the metal, giving the bloodied tissue pulp a more eerie appearance as blood dripped down, painting the handles crimson.

“Okay, just stay still for a while,” Lev instructed as he deposited the fetus into a bag. “Give your body a chance to recover and the bleeding will stop. Don’t worry if it takes a while, my mother bled for an hour. I’ll be right back.”

When Lev returned, he gave her a glass of water and placed a jug containing more next to the bed on the nightstand. “I’ll go bury this outside,” he said, indicating the extracted fetus, “it’s the same thing I did for my mother.”

“Okay, go ahead.” Abby couldn’t think of anything better to do anyway. It wasn’t like it would be worth it to have a funeral, not over an underdeveloped fetus. There would be no one to attend anyway.

After Lev left to attend to that task and wash off the tongs, Abby tried her best to get comfortable and ignore the pain as she kept a couple of clean towels positioned under her and between her legs.

_ I’m sorry, Owen, _ she thought grimly. Maybe if things had been different, she could have given him another child… at least one could have survived…

No, she couldn’t let herself feel bad about this. It had been the best decision, and Owen wasn’t around to voice his opinion anyway. It was done.

She took a deep breath and focused on drinking some water. She just needed to focus on getting better, then she and Lev would resume looking for the Fireflies… if any of them were left.

That was their future now, their only hope.


End file.
